R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find Out What It Means to Me and Millions of Others

Imagine walking across a parking lot to do your weekly shopping. The sun is shining. The birds are singing. Your mind is on your shopping list. A person passes you by. The person is staring at you. A group of people stand near the store's entry. As you approach you feel your heartbeat quicken, your breathing is shallow, you're looking for an escape route (if only subconsciously). You feel threatened. Everyone is looking at you, intensely. Some continue to stare as you pass by. Someone makes a comment about your body. You feel angry or ashamed.

This is what women feel every day. It's called sexual objectification, and women are usually the target.

I know, V-Day is over. But, every day that a woman is alive she must protect herself. Many of us are not aware that even staring at a woman is a violation of her privacy and right to respect.

Objectification is just what it says - treating another being as an object. For me the word object means form - it is devoid of content, or it's content can be subjected to my own projection of feeling and emotion. I look at a piece of abstract art. A feeling in my body arises. It is connected to an emotion from previous life experiences. I have poured myself into the form that is expressed in the painting.

A person is not a form. Each has her/his own energy/feelings/emotions/thoughts/breath/life. The person is full, as he/she was created by Spirit/God/dess. To place our own feeling/emotion on her/him, we dis-respect that which is already there. When we stare, we are unconscious of that energy, etc., that exists in this being. We do not appreciate this unique creation called human. We do not respect the love and energy with which God/dess/Spirit has created this man/woman.

Furthermore, we disrespect ourselves. We do not appreciate the energy and love that exists in ourselves. If we did, why would we need to project it on another? We would want to honor it and share it in a way that honored others appropriately. We would have boundaries that guarded against those who are unconsciously projecting themselves on us.

Respect is a cycle. If you chose not to respect yourself, chances are others will disrespect you. If you have no boundaries, you won't be conscious of them in others. Treat yourself with respect. Set the boundaries that make you feel safe. Treat others with respect. Keep this as a constant in your life, and defend it when you need to.

Violence against women is committed many times every second somewhere in our world. Even to women who truly respect themselves. Rape is not about sex. It is about power. There are lower levels of violence, like reaching out to touch a woman who has not given you permission to do so. Every woman can tell a story of being groped or grabbed at. This is a step just below rape. Every woman can tell stories of men using their eyes to undress her. This is a step below being grabbed. Every woman can tell of catcalls and stares coming her way. This is a step below being visually undressed.

Would you rape your mother, sister, daughter? How about grabbing at her? How about visually undressing her? How about staring at her body? Violence has many forms from the subtle to the overt. It must Stop Now! Violence destroys the sheer joy with which each woman was created. Respect yourself. Respect others. Respect God/dess/Spirit. Always.


Some great websites supporting the respect of women/human beings:

http://www.vday.org/mission

http://www.hrw.org/en/category/topic/women

http://www.aclu.org/womens-rights

http://www.now.org/

http://www.tewawomenunited.org

http://www.nobelwomensinitiative.org/

http://www.takebackthenight.org/history.html


If you have been a victim of violence and need help:

Contact information for the Santa Fe Rape Crisis Center: http://www.nmjustice.net/nmsc/juvenile/program.php?id=6510

Contact information for the Rape Crisis Center of Central New Mexico: http://rapecrisiscnm.org/contact-us

Help in Lincoln and Otero, NM Counties: http://www.sexhealthnews.org/


Reports on rape & sexual violence in New Mexico:

http://www.musc.edu/ncvc/grants/50_states_reports/new_mexico.pdf

http://www.womenscommission.state.nm.u

One of my favorite feminist/activists artists, just for you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vv1boF2EsVU